– I would like to have one dose of love please.
* 30ml? Or 60ml? What kind of love would you exactly need?
-Uhm…I do not know…instant?
* Oh I mean what do you intend to do with it? For which purpose? Inspiration, self-help, recreation, motivation, creativity, relaxation…?
– I just need it for rejuvenation, to lose a few kilos and to have more motivation. I need something with the least possible side effects.
* Ok then you should try this one mixed with butterflies as and the dash of Holly Golightly. It is really sweet and easy.
– Is this some new mixture?
* Yes it is newly developed, it does not cause almost any side effect as it stays on a surface, but it elevates you. It is particularly good to heal the winter depression. I would recommend it also in early spring, just to get you in shape for summer. If you need something stronger maybe for improving creativity I would suggest the combination called Morticia & Gomez. It contains a bit more passion, madness and individuality only must be used in correct doses not to exaggerate. Exaggeration can be very destructive.
– And what about this Anna Karenina? I have heard that it drives you straight up to the heaven.
* Yes, but I would not recommend it. It is true that it elevates you but it is only short term and on longer term it can cause delusions, manic behaviour, even suicide. We give it only with doctor’s prescription and must be used under strict supervision of the Right person.
– Ok then, let’s keep it superficial and elevating. How do I use it?
* Every two to three weeks just 30 drops. Take it with some sugar, cakes for instance, it will be sweeter and the effects will last longer. Just do not increase the dose. It could be dangerous. If used in a higher dosage it can get straight to the heart and go deeper under the skin. If you start feeling something, something more than just elevation, or start having the symptoms like short concentration spans or loss of concentration, restlessness, heart skipping the beat, melancholy and yes increased libido, then decrease the dosage. Use it once a month maybe and if the symptoms do not stop or if it gets worse than contact your doctor. He will prescribe you drops to neutralise the “feeling”. We do not want to get you in love for permanent.
-Neutralise? So it can be neutralised? Grand! What are these neutralizing drops made of?
*They contain strong pesticide. That is to kill the butterflies, yes… sad but necessary. Anyway in difficult cases they are no longer butterflies but hornets. They mostly contain Rhett Buttler’s approach, strong will, empowered with extract of “nobody cares” lily; kiss my ass tree, and the oil of fuck off leaves. In all cases it is recommendable to take it in company of Jack, Jim, Johnny or James. Just pour it over and drink it in one sip, this procedure should be repeated till the person stops feeling anything at all. It might cause numbness and sickness straight after using but it is efficient. As a side effect person can be jaded and bitter for some time but this symptoms disappear in short. So no worry there is always a cure.
– And just one more question. I am asking just for a friend of mine, off course. I think that she’s suffering from the worse kind of love. This addictive one, that is really killing her body and soul. Instead of elevating her it brings her down, tears her into bits and pieces. It makes her really sick and weak day after day. It is this, really malicious one that leaves hard consequences, deep scars and bruises all over… Is there something, some product something at all against that?
*Hm… this is that malicious, bad, violent one? That is like a cancer, even scarier?
– Yes exactly that one.
* There is a combination of products. They are derivatives of love. It is the combination of understanding, support, care, resolution and courage. After comes the treatment with self –confidence. It is quite hard to find these products on the market. Maybe I can recommend you some places where you can have a look “Love of a parent” or “Friends support”, you can also trywith “Institutions” they might also sometimes have it.
– Thank you very much. I’ll take this 30ml of Holly Golightly.
* Good choice. Enjoy your love…do not overdose.