When mating season is in animal world (and this happens once or maybe twice a year), it is the time for games. Birds for example. Boys will show the best of the singing, dancing(they even have the whole choreographies), they will grow the most beautiful feathers and parade in front of the ladies in order to show who’s the boss.The best will get the girl. Lady bird, by all that was presented to her will make her choice at the end. First she will play a little bit hard to get then she will give in and game over. After all it is only for this season.How wrong can it be? Egg is an egg.
In human world mating season lasts 365 days in year.That means that we have 365 days to play the games. Now in millennium it is actually all about the games. It is not even so much about mating. We just got a bit confused up with the rules. It looks like we are playing two different games. What when the game that should be played to unite us, does actually the opposite thing? And how much of this game playing is optimal to keep us hooked?
The other day I was talking to a friend of mine, beautiful, smart, self-confident girl, who concluded that she will stay single for the rest of her life because she simply always finishes with her heart broken because she probably does not understand the rules of his idiotic game. Is it rules,the game or we simply play out of a different motives and by this we have a different expectations? Thinking about all the stories that I have heard from my girls, my personal experiences it all follows a pretty much same pattern (maybe guys are learning from the same rulebook or we simply have that fucking luck to meet the same type over and over again) here is a small overview:
HIS Rule nr. 1: Do whatever you want but never show me your real feelings. I am not interested in this what I can get without any effort. You have to make me hunt you.
HER Rule nr. 1: Cut the crap, if I want something I say it. If I like you, I say I do. I say with the same easiness the opposite thing, so be happy you are among the chosen one. Besides, I also do the other things in life, and you know how hard it is to focus on my work when my processor is 99% occupied by you. This 1% percent I use for breathing, blinking and other body functions. On the other hand you did your best to invoke the feelings in me. We are playing on the field of emotions. If I didn’t have any feelings for you that would mean that take you as a“job”. Ask yourself if this is what you want? Or that I am a rubber doll. Maybe it is a time that you get yourself one.
HIS rule nr.2: It is all about the game remember? So when I am texting you I am throwing you hooks. Don’t swallow each and every. Don’t explain everything. Don’t answer immediately. Leave something hanging. We like the girls who know to how to be mysterious. That turns us on.
HER rule nr.2: Yeah right. That could maybe work if I had only one stuff to think about in my life and that would be you and strategies how to get you. That maybe worked back in high school we had plenty of time and life was easy. Now I have a life to live, and I am looking for someone who is also up to this task.The world is not turning around you prince.
This is how it works: If I like you, I like to hear from you. I like to get some nice word.That makes my day. I offer the same back. I hate when you disappear and play Mr. Hard to Get. I lose the interest and find you totally immature. By now we had several encounters with “Mr. Hard to Get” and you know, they are proven to be total waste of time. I would rather spend this time with Mr. Hard to Forget if you know what I mean.
HIS rule nr.3: We are hunters, and we like to compete with other hunters. You have to give me the impression that I am not the only one. When the girl has “eyes only for you” that is a turn off for us.That’s easy catch, makes you look desperate and makes us think that it is something wrong with you when nobody else wants you. On the other hand you should not behave too “available” for other guys;then it isthe end of the game.
HER rule nr.3: Real gentleman never talks. Looks like we have become more gentlemen then you. If I do not talk and brag about other guys who are flying around me that is out of a common courtesy and respect. If someone has real qualities that will for sure attract other people and you will notice it, don’t worry. So open your eyes I don’t need to tell you everything. At least hope I do not have to.
HIS rule nr.4: I hate when a girl after first sex gets emotional. That makes me feel caught. I need a bit of space and time. When she starts texting or calling me the day after. If I want more I will call, just don’t be pushy. If I don’t call it is obvious what it does it mean. By harassing me on the phone you are just digging yourself more.
HER rule nr.4:If you knew anything at all about women, you would know that yes we do get emotional after sex, same as you get sleepy, it is basic biology but it is complicated for you to understand, it includes hormones and stuff. Bottom line is: If I liked this first performance which we know by now, wasn’t your best and I think that there is a potential in you then I want more. Simple as that.You are still far from love of my life and no, that doesn’t mean that I want to merry you and have 3 kids, house and dog with you. I just like to see more. What I want I ask for it. You can say no that is ok, but just to disappear that is the reason to take out my voodoo doll and to stick the needle well… you know where and to leave it there for a very long time.
HIS rule nr.5: Sexiest girls know how to be angels and devils. Only self-confident girl can have that good balance. I also find sexy when she does something not so typical for a girl. That surprises me. And surprise factor is very important. She can be at the same time your lover and buddy. That’s awesome.
HER rule nr.5: Well we are surprised enough when he does something unexpected like opens the door for you, pays the dinner or at least the drink, has a job and doesn’t live with his mom, and does not scratch his balls in public. Nothing more to add to this point.
HIS rule nr.6: I hate when girl is trying to change me. I dress the way I like and feel comfortable,so take it or leave it.
HER rule nr.6:Good thnx for sharing that. So no more high heels, lingerie, tight dresses, short skirts, tight jeans, tight shirts. That is all uncomfortable. Only stretched jogging trousers and old t-shirt that I painted my walls in last year. Shit. And again I will look sexier than you.
HIS rule nr.7: Self-confidence is good, but there is catch. If she earns more than me, is more successful, drives better car, has more experience I feel kinda inferior. I like to have a space to impress the girl. So if you do, you should keep it a bit down.
HER rule nr. 7: Or you should keep it a bit up but ok…Just to tell you one secret. We live in millennium. Stories about prince charming in shining armour who is here to save me, mostly make me laugh. Naked truth: I don’t need you. I can do all by myself, really all. That too prince. I am with you because I like you, not because I need you. I think this is how it should be if two grown up people are involved in any kind of relationship. There is still a lot of space for you to impress me. Nothing is standing on your way to stand up and be the man I deserve, or you can sit down so that I can see the others who would fit better to this role. However you have a choice.If you think I am too much for you, then do not mess with me from the start, capishi?
HIS rule nr.8: From time to time confuse her, provoke her. It is all part of the game. Say one thing, and behave in other way, off course you will do it if you if you are interested in her. For instance, try to talk her in to give a chance to some other guy, but be sure to pick someone who has 0 chances. If she reacts defensive she is still on the hook. If she likes you she will freak out. No girl who is interested in you would like that you behave like her friend. It is a good test.
HER rule nr.8: Hey Einstein, I know what you are doing. This is exactly why I let you see my reaction and it will be there as long as I am interested in you though this move just makes you sink in my eyes. It shows that you are insecure, scared and have problems with communication. If you want to know how I feel then just ask. I will be more than happy to tell you that. If I really like you I may tolerate you that shit once or twice, just do not play that move too often. I stand it to feed your ego as I got that you need a bit of encouragement, but while you are playing your little ego-trip game, there might be already someone behind your back who knows which buttons to press and who has no problem with insecurity. Then the only reaction you will get from me will be the middle finger and you will find yourself dug deep in box with big L on the top together with other losers who thought they were smart.
What we want to hear it is not hard to figure out. You have it almost in every song on the radio. Learn from the best if you can’t remember something smart yourself.
HIS rule nr.9: If she turns me down, I should give her a bit more time or try a different approach. Maybe she has been hurt before and she is scared to try again.
HER rule nr.9: No Freud. If I turn you down that means that I am not interested and this will not change with a time or your approach. Maybe it is true, and I have been hurt by some asshole before, but this does not change your position. If you would have been right for me, I would not hesitate. If out of nothing else then out of pure curiosity. We are much braver than you think we are.
Continue the list…